Numbering Our Days (The Clock Is Ticking Down)

Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.

- Psalm 90:12

In about one month, on my birthday, I will have been alive exactly 13,185 days (the leap years have been accounted for in that figure). This is a sobering number.

It's tempting to look back and say "what have I done with my time?" or "were the things I spent time on worth it?" These are natural questions to ask yourselves; particularly if you have something in your life you would like to change.

If you're anything like me you have that sort of "mental list" that is always sort of floating around in your mind (or the top drawer of your desk, or in your wallet) of things that you would like to get done and things that you "need" to get done.

What's pretty interesting is that even though I'm soon to be thirty-six and have started to get gray hairs and stiff knees, I can still find ways to put off doing the things that need to be done. I can still find ways to avoid the "wisdom" that David talks about in the Psalms.

Some distractions and diversions come in the form of good gifts from God like family and talents. Having kids, particularly having young kids is pretty all-consuming at first. Being involved in ministry is a blessing. But even these good things can be leaned on for reasons not to get to the things that need to be done.

On the other side of the coin, there are some folks who are so focused on life "to do lists" that they miss their children growing up, or miss out on quality friendships that could have been made if they had just taken their eyes off their itinerary for just a few minutes.

There are so many ways to be distracted from what is really important, from living wisely. It's pretty easy to forget to "number our days". John Lennon, of Beatles fame, said in a song that "life is what happens when you are making other plans".

Because it's easy to assume that the "future me" will get his or her act together. "Surely this thing won't go on like this indefinitely. I'm sure to spend more time with my kids or take care of that chronic financial matter or bad habit someday. There is no way that this will go on forever." But we all know that time passes more quickly than we ever realize, and soon that thing we should have addressed is now a huge, looming issue. Or suddenly that child is leaving the house and you never got to be that godly, intentional parent that you had meant to be.

When I look out my office window (in my wonderful "man cave" at home) at changing leaves I'm always shocked. "It was just the forth of July and 100 degrees outside! Why is there frost on my car windshield and freezing cold mornings! Where did the summer go!

The summer has gone, and life is going along with it. May you and I be people who "number our days" like the Lord tells us to, and thereby live the wise lives He is calling us to live.

So make that phone call, write that letter. Take that child out for a special date and tell them how much God loves them and that He has a plan for their lives. Write your wife a love note or call that old friend and catch up. Write that book or start that ministry opportunity that God has laid on your heart. Go do it!

The clock is ticking.

Making Eye Contact With God

Have you ever been walking down a busy sidewalk or through a crowded room and momentarily caught someone’s eye by accident? That brief second of eye contact is usually an odd thing to share with a complete stranger, and because of this we usually look away as quick as possible. There is something intimate about staring into someone’s eyes and when we accidentally do it both parties usually feel the awkwardness. Or sometimes, if you are tremendously unlucky and make eye contact with the wrong person, you might get beat up.

But if you are trying to connect with someone, looking them in the eye is a great place to start. I’m learning that if I really want my young daughters to hear what I’m saying I ask them to look me in the eye.

Studies show that making eye contact with young babies increased their sense of connection with their parents and leads to a better sense of well-being and less anxiety. (And by default, less crying, insecurity and separation panic when mom and dad have to leave the room for a second.)

It even works with pets. If you make eye contact with your cat at least once a day they are less likely to engage in attention getting behaviors like shredding your furniture or doing their business in odd areas of the house. Just a second of eye contact can save you that “kitty” smell in your house.

If the eyes are the “windows to the soul” (a phrase that has its origins in scripture) then it makes sense that staring straight into someone’s eyes creates an intimacy that can’t be matched any other way. And conversely, if someone never makes eye contact they are most often looked at in a suspect way. Retailers have a rule of thumb that if a suspicious customer will not make eye contact or even say hello to a salesman then they should be watched extra-carefully for shoplifting activities. 

I’ve been a Jesus follower for a good portion of my life, but sometimes the simplest things still elude me. I know that if I start my morning by making eye contact with God (reading His word, praying for just a few minutes) then things go immeasurably better for the rest of the day. But too often I start the day by reading something else (like the recap of the previous night’s NBA playoff game) and miss out on a vital moment making eye contact with God.

As we are talking more and more about “calling” at Oasis, the question probably comes up in your mind time after time: “how do you hear from God?”

It’s perhaps the most basic question of faith, but I think the answer starts with being intentional. Trying to hear from God is the best first step in actually hearing from God. Making “eye contact” daily helps me get to know my daughters and my wife better (and for them to get to know me better) and a little time with the Lord in a quiet space helps me get to know Him better.

The Psalms talk about this over and over. David says “early in the morning will I call out to thee”. He was known as “a man after God’s own heart” (not by any stretch a perfect man, but one who “knew” God) and its my guess that time spent meditating on God’s word (pretty much the theme of the Bible’s longest chapter, Psalm 119) and making eye contact with God helped him through the craziness of God’s calling on his life.

It’s the nuts and bolts stuff of faith (the kind of stuff I need to be reminded of time and time again) that lead to the deeper life with the Lord that I desire, and it’s a joy to be in a small group and a congregation where I am continually reminded of what is important. If I try and be a loan wolf and do the Christian life on my own, the only thing that suffers is my own walk with God. It’s just how I’m wired. As a writer I can get lost in my own thoughts for days and forget to make eye contact with the divine. Its good to get together with other believes to collectively try to hear God’s calling and to be encouraged to make the time to try to hear it individually.

So may we all seek to make eye contact with God daily and encourage each other to make contact as well.

That beats reading about a basketball game any day.

Thoughts From A Porch

Praying For More (Thoughts From A Porch)

Both the church I went to as a teenager and the camp I worked at had these great, old-fashioned porches. You know the kind, the ones that wrap around and have plenty of chairs for crowds to gather. These two porches frequently inspired great conversation whenever two or more people gathered on them.

We would talk about art and music and how they played into our faith. We would discuss lofty questions like "how many angels can dance on the head of the pin" (my friend Dave would say "millions and millions, angels are not spacialy challenged!") and the more serious questions about what God wanted us to do with our lives and what He was teaching us in that moment. This was quite honestly a magical time in my spiritual life, a time when spontaneous prayer was normal and good, deeply affecting conversation was the norm.

I sort of thought that life would always be like this, surrounded by conversation and the excess time to sit and trade stories with my friends.

My house has a great porch with a pretty great view, but it mostly serves as a storage facility for excess stuff, and a place for my cats to sack out in the sun on a fuzzy blanket.

Because the truth is that I don't have a lot of excess time right now for deep conversation. Whatever good talks I have with my wife or friends usually happens in the car on a trip somewhere. Whatever bandwidth I have in my brain is usually reserved for scheduling family events, paying bills and attempting to finish the book I'm writing.

Two things happened to me recently that have gotten me thinking of those porches and the spiritual life they represented to me.

The first was that a few weekends ago I actually went back to my old church and sat on that porch and remembered. The second was what we've been talking about in my life-group (I recommend highly finding one and plugging in) recently.

We always have a great time of prayer together, and if you hang out with the same folks long enough you will see people go through the cycles of life. There will be times when everything is falling apart and you need to seriously pray for someone's daily need to be met. You need to pray for physical healing for your brothers and sisters and all sorts of other important things.

But what we have been realizing is that you can get caught up in praying for the day to day stuff and forget the big picture of faith.

At the end of the book of Colossians Paul asks that the church he is writing to would "pray for us too, that God may open a door for our message, so that we may proclaim the mystery of Christ, for which I'm in chains."

Hold the presses here. Paul is not asking for people to pray that he would get out of prison, but that the Lord would use the situation to open a door for the message of Jesus.

I don't know about you, but my request would be about the immediate thing; "pray that God gets me out of here!"

But there is something beyond the immediate need.

Here is where I think the two thoughts (talking about big picture stuff on the porch like "God's will" and small picture, everyday stuff like praying for a sick friend) collide. They are both important to remember, and equally important to pray for and dwell on. If my good friend asks me to pray for him or her because they are having a rough day, then it's important to God because He cares about rough days. But I also want to pray for my friend to understand how their lives weave into the fabric of what God is doing in their little corner of the world. I want to pray that they would understand how God has created them (what their "calling" in life is); what their gifts and talents can profit their world for the Lord and those around them. It's easy to pray "God, get them thought this day." It's tougher to remember to lift our eyes up and realize that that friend has a role to play in God's plan, and to pray that they would understand and see that.

I'm going back to that camp this summer, and I'm going to sit on that porch overlooking the lake and spend some quiet time praying for those who the Lord has placed in my life (my wife and two daughters, my lifegroup, the guy in the store in swapped funny stories with at the check out counter). I'm going to pray for the immediate needs and the big picture stuff too.

And then I think I'll go for a swim.

Living Crazy Love

Being cynical is easy. So is being jaded and skeptical. Seeing the world from a distance, observing and not joining, watching; these are easy to do.

I was a medic in the Air Force, and one of the first things they taught us in medic school in regard to battlefield medicine was that you have to maintain an "emotional distance" from the patient you are working on. You can't get to attached to the soldier or airman who is wounded because emotion can cloud your judgement and can throw you off your task. If the person you are working on dies you have to be able to move on to the next patient without a hitch. Saving lives depends on timing, and there is no time for emotion.

I've been a believer for a long time now, and too many times lately I find myself viewing ministry through my "clinical lens;" seeing it from a nice safe distance and making judgement calls from the safe confines of my computer or couch.

When I hear a brother or sister in Christ talk about how they are feeling called to reach out to a certain people group or start a ministry or how "on fire" for God they feel, I find myself viewing it from a careful distance and saying "good for them, I hope it works out."

I have not always been this way, I once was (and on occasion will be) a passionate individual about spiritual matters, but as I get older (and more and more comfortable in my easy chair and wonderful home) I can feel the detachment growing.

And it's hard to know how to fight it.

My life group (you should join one, they're great!) has been working our way through a book called Crazy Love on Tuesday nights, and it's all about how the only sane response to God's crazy love is an equally crazy love and passion for the things of the Lord. (Loving your neighbor as yourself, loving personal time with the Lord each day etc.)

As we made our way through the chapters I felt the cynicism creeping in; the voice that says "that's great to talk about on the pages of a book, but real life is way different."

I think the author knew this was a common response, so near the end of the book he simply recounts people he knows who are doing crazy things for the Lord.

This is brilliant! It's hard to be cynical when someone you know reasonably well is shaking off the cobwebs of modern life and live out God's crazy love for us.

So I made a list of people I know. Here are a few examples.

Walking across New Hampshire for Africa

Last fall I had the privilege of walking a bit and doing a newspaper story on Brian Cassel, a state D.O.T. employee nearing retirement who uses a week of his vacation time each year to walk from one side of New Hampshire to the other to raise money for clean drinking water in Africa. His church, Grace Capital, joins him along the way and the money goes to "Global Benefit Coffee" an organization dedicated to clean water in Africa and that got it's start as an idea by a fellow church member. Brian and Global Benefit are inspiring to me.

Open Handed Grace

Oasis youth group member Lauren Mclaughlin and a few friends have recently started Open Handed Grace, a ministry that simply makes and delivers food to the various homeless camps around the Concord area. No muss, no fuss, just visiting folks, bringing some food and hanging out. Lauren is a high school sophomore.

Rise Again Outreach

On the last Saturday of every month I have the privilege of going with the Rise Again bus to a tough neighborhood near where I live and hanging out with, praying for, counseling and laughing together with folks who go "shopping for free" on the bus. This bus is always well stocked with donated items (organized by an army of volunteers around the Concord area) and folks get needed items and just enjoy each other's company. I am always more blessed and inspired for going out for the afternoon. (Including some crazy cold days in January and February.) Rise Again started as an idea by a local church and is growing every day.

Run For Freedom

Oasis friend Bethany Syversen recently became the New Hampshire director for Run For Freedom, an organization bringing hope to and awareness of the millions in this world (some as young as one of my daughters) who are trafficked for the purposes of sex. This is a grizzly topic, but Bethany and many like her are shedding the light of Christ in this dark area. I had the privilege of interviewing Bethany for a newspaper story about this subject.

Missionaries

In the last three months or so I have met three young missionary families who are leaving it all behind to go to places like the jungles and deserts Southeast Asia to share the gospel. When I met missionary's when I was a kid they seemed like "super people" who did amazing things for the Lord, but these folks I have met recently are very normal families who look like mine. But they are living without a safety net in some tough areas of the world because people there have never heard about Jesus and his love for them.

John the Plumber

One of my lifegroup members, John Case, is in the Dominican Republic this week installing plumbing to the glory of God in a mission clinic in a mountainous area of the country. He is good with his hands and wants to use them to help spread the gospel.


It's hard to be cynical and detached when so many close to me are "living on the edge."

May we all lose our cynicism. May we dive in headfirst into what God is calling us to do with our lives. May you and I live the crazy love we have been shown in Jesus.

Give Me Ears To Hear (I'm confused now, but I know there's an answer here)

"Whoever has ears, let them hear." - Jesus in Matthew 11:15

"You can educate a man, but you cannot make him think" - Ben Harper


I had a few college professors who drove their students crazy, because they would never give straight answers to questions.

Instead they would either answer in a cryptic, circular way (a little bit like Yoda from Star Wars), or they would answer your question with another question.

I had one of these professors for an eight am class and another one right after lunch.

When you are just waking up, or in a bit of a food coma, you just want the answer or the facts that will be on the test, you don't want to have to think.

Because thinking, really thinking, is work. Wrestling through a strange answer is effort.

Jesus was a great teacher, and he knew that getting the crowds around him to wrestle with big truths about God the Father and the nature of faith would weed out those who were just there for the excitement of the event.

He was not shy about announcing his intentions about this. He would begin many teachings with this great statement: "For him that has ears to hear, let him hear."

This was his way of saying "understanding what God is like will be hard work, expanding your concept of grace and holiness and the nature of the Father will take time and effort, but the truth will find the hearts of those who really want to understand, those who have the ears to hear."

Because in the small towns and villages of Israel he was the most interesting thing happening at the time, and everywhere he went crowds would follow, not to understand the nature of God more, but for the kick of seeing the dude everyone was talking about.

But it's interesting to note that there are many times that the gospels mention that after he was done teaching for the day the crowds would be almost non-existent, because when Jesus starts talking in parables or riddles, the multitudes tune out a bit and suddenly find something else that they needed to do. ("Is that guy talking about planting seeds and lost sheep? I think I left the oven on, I should go check.")

There were a few times that it was just the disciples and a few others who remained after the crowds dissipated, and I love that they were not afraid to say things like "Master, this is a hard teaching."

What's comforting to me is that there were also times the gospels record that a few days later Jesus' followers would say something like "Master, that thing about the mustard seed that you said a few days ago, could you tell us what you were talking about?" And Jesus would walk them through the little piece of truth that he wanted them to understand.

Those who follow Jesus often get labeled as having "turned off their brains."

But nothing could be farther from the truth.

The whole Bible is full of huge concepts that take time to wrestle through.

What's amazing is that the gospel (our need of forgiveness of sins and the death and resurrection of Christ being the bridge of that forgiveness) is both easy enough for my five year old daughter to comprehend and accept, (praise the Lord) and complex enough to take a lifetime to figure it out. (Praise the Lord for the Holy Spirit, who helps us understand and acts as our guide.)

The Lord honors both the simple faith of my daughter and the diligent study of his word by her dad.

So may we be a group of folks who do the hard work of figuring out what it is that the Lord has for us to learn this day, this week and this year.

May we have "ears to hear".

Have a great week,

- Alex (Tincan) Caldwell

Lord, Be My Battery

It's cold and still a little dark out when I go out to our porch and pull on my boots and jacket. My gloves are stiff when I put them on because I forgot to bring them inside last night to warm up.

I open the door and breath in the freezing air as I see the world around me slowly waking and coming to; the occasional car driving by, their headlights illuminating the light snow that is falling.

The big tree in our front yard is covered in Christmas lights and is a bright beacon in this snow covered world I find myself in.

I head to the ol' minivan and start the process of moving the snow in order to find and open the driver's side door.

I come out early to brush off and start the car so that my girls can have a warm ride to school, but this traipsing around in the snow is never really as fun as they seem to think it is.

Most mornings when I do this I like to play some Bob Marley on the van's stereo system as I attack the ice and snow that coats the vehicle. The Caribbean music reminds me that someplace it's warm. I also like to bring out my coffee with me and set the hot mug in the snow on top of the van and watch it steam in the air and melt a ring of snow around it.

But on this particular morning there won't be any Bob Marley on the radio or windshield defroster helping me clear the front window.

When I turn the key to start the whole process I hear nothing but a click and that soul crushing whining sound of a dead battery.

I look into the back seat of the van and see that one of my young daughters has left the light above her seat on, (the one that she can now reach and loves to turn on and off as we drive along) and that explains the dead battery.

So I sigh and start the process of getting the other car in position for jumper cables.

This also means that there is now another vehicle to clean off.

In the same way there are many times in life I feel my spiritual battery running low, unable to power my life in a way that brings any meaning or allows me to be bearable to those around me I love and cherish.

I've been going to Church all my life, and I know the language and customs well. I know how to appear (mostly) like I have it all together and figured out.

But the thing is that as I get older and life gets more complex, (relationships with my wife, daughters, friends, co-workers, bills, dead batteries, general fatigue of life etc.) my ability to conduct my life well under my own power is taking a hit.

The fruit of the Spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, self-discipline, gentleness, goodness, faith, longsuffering) are things I desperately want in my life, but as hard as I try, I can't summon up enough will power on my own to be a patient dad, a loving friend or self-disciplined person.

Here is the paradox of the whole situation: I was never meant to be able to conduct life on my own.

Jon just finished up a terrific, almost six month overview of the book of Romans called "The Great Exchange" in which the books writer, the apostle Paul explains that the Lord want to replace, to exchange the burdens we carry in this life for the joy and peace He has to offer.

Paul ends the book with these powerful words in chapter 16:

"Now all glory to God, who is able to make you strong, just as my Good News says."

This is basic faith 101, that it's the Lord's power that gives us the strength to run this race of life well. Running on our own power leaves dead batteries and cars that sit in the driveway.

The older I get, the more I need to remember the Sunday School lessons I once learned, it's all God, from the moment of Salvation (I was a thirteen year old kid on a Sunday morning who felt the Lord's call) to my final breath, the power to conduct this life well comes from God.

Maybe you are running under your own power and feeling the drain of life, maybe it's time to give it over to Him (a process we learn little by little, just like a toddler walking) and experience the "Great Exchange" of life lived with the power of a full battery.

May your fire burn brightly

Lord, Be My Battery

It's cold and still a little dark out when I go out to our porch and pull on my boots and jacket. My gloves are stiff when I put them on because I forgot to bring them inside last night to warm up.

I open the door and breath in the freezing air as I see the world around me slowly waking and coming to; the occasional car driving by, their headlights illuminating the light snow that is falling.

The big tree in our front yard is covered in Christmas lights and is a bright beacon in this snow covered world I find myself in.

I head to the ol' minivan and start the process of moving the snow in order to find and open the driver's side door.

I come out early to brush off and start the car so that my girls can have a warm ride to school, but this traipsing around in the snow is never really as fun as they seem to think it is.

Most mornings when I do this I like to play some Bob Marley on the van's stereo system as I attack the ice and snow that coats the vehicle. The Caribbean music reminds me that someplace it's warm. I also like to bring out my coffee with me and set the hot mug in the snow on top of the van and watch it steam in the air and melt a ring of snow around it.

But on this particular morning there won't be any Bob Marley on the radio or windshield defroster helping me clear the front window.

When I turn the key to start the whole process I hear nothing but a click and that soul crushing whining sound of a dead battery.

I look into the back seat of the van and see that one of my young daughters has left the light above her seat on, (the one that she can now reach and loves to turn on and off as we drive along) and that explains the dead battery.

So I sigh and start the process of getting the other car in position for jumper cables.

This also means that there is now another vehicle to clean off.

In the same way there are many times in life I feel my spiritual battery running low, unable to power my life in a way that brings any meaning or allows me to be bearable to those around me I love and cherish.

I've been going to Church all my life, and I know the language and customs well. I know how to appear (mostly) like I have it all together and figured out.

But the thing is that as I get older and life gets more complex, (relationships with my wife, daughters, friends, co-workers, bills, dead batteries, general fatigue of life etc.) my ability to conduct my life well under my own power is taking a hit.

The fruit of the Spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, self-discipline, gentleness, goodness, faith, longsuffering) are things I desperately want in my life, but as hard as I try, I can't summon up enough will power on my own to be a patient dad, a loving friend or self-disciplined person.

Here is the paradox of the whole situation: I was never meant to be able to conduct life on my own.

My pastor Jon just finished up a terrific, almost six month overview of the book of Romans called "The Great Exchange" in which the books writer, the apostle Paul explains that the Lord want to replace, to exchange the burdens we carry in this life for the joy and peace He has to offer.

Paul ends the book with these powerful words in chapter 16:

"Now all glory to God, who is able to make you strong, just as my Good News says."

This is basic faith 101, that it's the Lord's power that gives us the strength to run this race of life well. Running on our own power leaves dead batteries and cars that sit in the driveway.

The older I get, the more I need to remember the Sunday School lessons I once learned, it's all God, from the moment of Salvation (I was a thirteen year old kid on a Sunday morning who felt the Lord's call) to my final breath, the power to conduct this life well comes from God.

Maybe you are running under your own power and feeling the drain of life, maybe it's time to give it over to Him (a process we learn little by little, just like a toddler walking) and experience the "Great Exchange" of life lived with the power of a full battery.